Accept Advice and Discipline

Listen to advice and accept discipline, and at the end you will be counted among the wise.
Proverbs 19:20 NIV

Do you ever have trouble taking advice from others or accepting discipline? Man, I know at times it can really be a struggle for me.  I let my pride get in the way, and I think my way is the best way.  Sometimes, we need to be disciplined so bad, but we just do not recognize it as men.  We are the disciplinarians not the ones being disciplined.

The Bible  tells that when we accept discipline (from God and others), and we lean on good Godly people for advice, we can end up counted among the wise.

We should be prayerful, that God leads us to these people, and that we can be submissive to the information He gives us through them!

With love, dlp

M.I.T.T.

Lead with love

When Paul’s imprisonment in Rome, he became the mentor and close friend of a slave who had run away from his master, named Onesimus. The owner of Onesimus was Philemon. Paul wrote to Philemon, asking him to receive Onesimus as a brother in Christ, he wrote this letter out of love, not as a dictator demanding it.

“Although in Christ I could be bold and order you to do what you ought to do, yet I prefer to appeal to you on the basis of love. . . . [Onesimus] is very dear to me but even dearer to you, both as a fellow man and as a brother in the Lord”  Philemon 8-9, 16

Paul, a huge contributor and leader of the early church, often gave clear commands to the followers of Jesus. This time, he appealed to Philemon on the basis of equality, friendship, and love. “I did not want to do anything without your consent, so that any favor you do would not seem forced but would be voluntary” (v. 14).

Men, this is a great example of leading with love. As I have been thrust into the role of the at home teacher I really need this reminder of leading not dictating. Often I tell my kids exactly how they are supposed to do their work and when and I don’t want to very from that. As you can imagine this doesn’t always go over well. When I lead with love, and let them have a say in when and how things get done, everyone has a better day!

Zach

Fishing

I’m going to get again piggy back off of Michael’s post from yesterday, mostly because I can definitely relate to it. We have our pest control business so fortunately I have been able to continue to work to some extent doing outside work. My wife is a teacher though and she has been home with our 7 year old and our 3 year old while still trying to do some teaching as well. Needless to say it been anything but easy. I will say though I thank God for this opportunity though be it I wish it was under different circumstances. So far I have gotten to go golfing with my oldest twice, and my kids have gotten to to go fishing probably half a dozen times. We have been camping once and had more movie nights than I can care to count. God has made our relationships all stronger by slowing down time basically. We haven’t had the hustle and bustle of both parents working, one kid in school with activities 3-4 nights a week. We are simply home with each other and while there are trying days of course, overall I’m thankful for this opportunity. It has helped me become a better and to see my flaws that I have in both being a husband and father. I’m praying that God will help me with short temper at times and showing grace not only during this time but going forward.

Listening to the Spirit

Jesus is sharing with the disciples about this in John 16:12-15: 12I still have much to tell you, but you cannot yet bear to hear it. 13However, when the Spirit of truth comes, He will guide you into all truth. For He will not speak on His own, but He will speak what He hears, and He will declare to you what is to come. 14He will glorify Me by taking from what is Mine and disclosing it to you. 15Everything that belongs to the Father is Mine. That is why I said that the Spirit will take from what is Mine and disclose it to you.”

During this pandemic, one thing I have been very thankful for is that I have been getting more time alone with the Lord both in reading His word and in prayer. I am not sharing this as a badge of honor, but just as a reality that this crisis has made me realize how broken I am, how much I like control (the illusion of it really) and how much I really, really need the Lord. My soul, my joy, my attitude, my leadership to my family and my ability to serve them so depends on that relationship and what flows out of it. It is from the Lord’s leading and power that things get accomplished. Not my ways. I learned the hard way this weekend that what works for me doesn’t work the same for everyone. Especially my spouse and my teenagers. I like having strong routines and rhythms and feel they help give us balance and sanity when things are out of control and daunting. Going to bed at a decent hour and getting up early to get things going with the Lord is a good rhythm..for me and others. But not when its brow beat upon you when everything else already feels so restricting. Friday night I listenend to my wife share about struggles and Saturday the Holy Spirit revealed it was happening to all of my family. While it was beautiful outside, my family was shutdown inside our house, not wanting to do anything or talk about it either. Thanks be to God I followed the Lord’s prompting. I got my youngest daughter to help me prepare dinner and then let the family know we were going for a drive. I called it “The Miller Music Party Sunset Cruise”. We all piled in our family minivan, opened up the windows and sunroof and cranked up 80’s music as we drove around our local lake (Lake Jacomo) in Blue Springs and took in the sunset. The warm air, the fun beats, singing along, the beauty of God’s creation and us just getting out together really lifted our family’s spirits. Thanks be to God, we then felt led to drive up to some church family friend’s driveway and asked if they wanted ice cream from a safe social distance! We did that, went home and then crashed. Today’s activity was my oldest daughter’s idea: We had a Bob Ross painting party. It was silly, fun and therapeutic despite all of us realizing Bob makes it seem so easy. Thanks be to the Lord, he knew what my family needed far more than I did and I am glad he revealed it.

And one of the teens just was being himself. 🙂

The Best Pursuits

Proverbs 21:21

21 Whoever pursues righteousness and love
finds life, prosperity and honor.

Pastors, another online service. Give your congregation all of your effort and energy.

Proverbs is such a great book for advice and guidance. These pursuits listed above can apply to more than just our overall life in general. What if we pursue righteousness and love in our relationships? What if we pursue them in our occupation? Think how great those endeavors would be.

Don’t limit your opportunities for these pursuits or anything else. Strive for righteousness, strive to be loving in all aspects.

Make it a great week in the trenches. Be exceptional at being you.

Love,

Yancey

When We See the Blessing, But Don’t Get to Know the Why

Proverbs 3:5-6

5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
6 in all your ways submit to him,
and he will make your paths straight.

Deuteronomy 10:18

18 He defends the cause of the fatherless and the widow, and loves the foreigner residing among you, giving them food and clothing.

I don’t know if I have shared before, but my family has always had horses. In fact, they had them long before I was around. I have become more involved with them in recent years and I have enjoyed almost all parts of it.

Like anything, there will be loss and while not a human life, a horse’s life means a lot to me. They have their own personalities and ours are friendly and like attention.

This foaling season has had some misfortune for our mares. Without us knowing, one of our mares carried twins (which is bad for horses) almost to full gestation and lost them at birth. Yesterday at a local vet clinic we had another mare deliver a full term, full sized colt that was stillborn. When the clinic called my dad, they said that the mare was still out there with her stillborn baby literally mourning.

This was not an easy to take. I can’t remember a year where two mares lost their foals. It was a sad situation.

Let me backtrack a little. Thursday, in a town about 30 minutes away, a gentleman who also raises horses had a mare who birthed a healthy foal, but for some reason, the mare wouldn’t claim the baby. They gave the foal two doses of plasma just to nourish her in hopes that they could get the mare time to claim her baby somehow. Nothing was working so they were bringing her to the same vet clinic this morning.

There is some technique that vets use to help animals claim offspring that are not biologically their own. They called my dad again to ask permission to try this technique with our mare as the “adoptive” mare and it worked. Our mare is now the proud mother of the unclaimed foal from 30 minutes away.

So is this a happy story or a sad story? We were hoping for a healthy baby out of our mare. That was not to be. The other gentleman would have had to raise his foal as an orphan or the foal could have died … or both. Today’s Manly Message came to light when I stopped by to check on our mare at the vet clinic. She was taking care of that baby that Thursday was unclaimed and needing plasma injections. On Friday, that baby foal had a caring and protective mother … there was no doubt.

So take care of others in need and lean not on your own understanding. We don’t always get to know the why, but we do get to lean on our faith. That applies to illnesses, jobs, etc. I have read and heard many times that a person doesn’t rise to the occasion, they sink to the level of their training. That’s why it is imperative to have a strong faith in place when something unforeseen takes place.

Make it a great day in the trenches. Be exceptional at being you.

Love,

Yancey

Family Friday 4/24: The Skateboard

Good morning, men! For those here who deal with anxiety, no…this is not a real picture! It is a painting titled “Skateboard” by Australian painter Ron Francis. As you may know, I taught Art History for years, yet I never saw this painting until recently.

Today, I would like to piggy back off what Dustin wrote yesterday about discernment. When I saw this image, I thought of my younger self. When I say younger, I literally mean up until I was 30. Young me looks at this and says, “DO IT! Fear is weakness, broken bones heal, and it may be your only chance!”

Post-Jesus, father of three Andy sees this image as a great example of why we need the Spirit guiding us with discernment. Without the Father’s guidance, and the wisdom of those around us who genuinely care for us, we tend to rush headlong into poor decisions made on the whims of a heartbeat. If it feels good….do it. Who cares what the rules are? Who made those rules, anyway?!

In my mind, I imagine this little boy seeing only the thrill ahead and not a single consequence. My brain wants the vantage point to be from a loving parent, who isn’t suppressing that innate courage, but guiding with loving concern from experience.

As we head out this weekend, find ways to listen to discernment from the Spirit in your life. And if you are one of those black and white, yes and no folks….try to leave room for “go ahead, just slap on a helmet and knee pads.”

Have a blessed day and a restful weekend!

M.I.T.T. ~ Runyan

Discretion is Advised

My wife and I have been reading one chapter of Proverbs together per morning.  Solomon, the writer, is known for his wisdom.  Why did he have so much wisdom? In a dream, Solomon was approached by God and asked what he would want.  Instead of asking for any type of self reward or protection he asked for wisdom.  God was pleased with this request and he granted it.

The word that continues to pop out in many of the chapters is “discretion”.  The timing is always perfect with God, because we are currently making an effort to teach our kids how to have discretion in their everyday lives.  But, in the process it’s made me reflect on my lack of discretion in my life!

Good Ole’ Mr. Webster has this to say:

Definition of discretion

1a: individual choice or judgment left the decision to his discretion

b: power of free decision or latitude of choice within certain legal bounds reached the age of discretion

2: the quality of having or showing discernment or good judgment : the quality of being discreet: CIRCUMSPECTIONespecially : cautious reserve in speech

3: ability to make responsible decisions

4: the result of separating or distinguishing

From the definition this could go a ton of different ways from here. But, I just love that even the definition in the dictionary uses the word “discernment” to define “discretion”. We are fully aware as Christian’s that discernment can only come from one place, and that’s God through the guidance of the Holy Spirit.  My ability to show discretion in what I say, what I do, what I watch, what I listen to, who I hang out with etc….is directly tied to my ability to pray for discernment and wisdom from the Holy Spirit!

Go into todays world with this verse in mind:

Discretion will protect you, and understanding will guard you.
Proverbs 2:11  NIV

With love, dlp

M.I.T.T.

Samson

I have been working my way through the Old Testament and time and time again come across stories of how the Lord uses imperfect people, people just like you and me who mess up to be his messengers and his leaders.

I just read through the account of Samson, many of us probably remember the part about him being very strong until his hair was cut, they being captured, and ripping down the columns. What I didn’t remember was the following. Samson was married before, he got mad at his wife and gave her to one of his companions. Before he met Delilah he was spending time with prostitutes. Through these faults the Lord still used him to benefit the kingdom.

Men, this story isn’t to encourage you to do sinful things, its to show you that even if you have done, are still doing, or in the future will do sinful things the Lord will still have a purpose for you. Turn to him to find out what this purpose is.

Zach